


We're Going to be Alright, Tommy

by queenofsevenfandoms



Category: The Maze Runner Series - All Media Types, The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bisexual Thomas (Maze Runner), Book/Movie 3: The Death Cure, Crank Newt (Maze Runner), Fix-It, Happy Ending, M/M, Newt (Maze Runner) Lives, Post-Canon Fix-It, Post-The Death Cure, Sad Newt (Maze Runner), The Death Cure Spoilers, The Fever Code Spoilers, crank palace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:41:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28431063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenofsevenfandoms/pseuds/queenofsevenfandoms
Summary: Rewrite for Death Cure book and movie because Newt deserved to live. A mix of the books and movies.A few steps behind Keisha, a tall shank rounded the corner. A large bag was slumped over his shoulder, and from the looks of it, another one strapped across his back. His skin was so pale it was translucent, his clothes loose on his thin frame. The boy ran a hand through his floppy blonde hair, but froze the moment he looked up.The boy's eyes met Thomas’s, and he uttered the only word that came to his mind. “Newt.”
Relationships: Newt & Thomas (Maze Runner), Newt/Thomas (Maze Runner)
Comments: 13
Kudos: 83





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If you've not read the Death Cure or Crank Palace, Keisha, Dante, and Jackie are characters Newt met while at Crank Palace. The events of what happened in Death Cure are a combination of the movie and book. A lot of the things Newt says are from the book, but a lot of how the events played out (aside from Newt going to the Crank Palace) are from the movie.
> 
>   
> A few important PSA's for changes:
> 
> -Thomas did 'kill' Newt (like in the books) but the way it went down was like the movies with a bit of wrestling and a knife.  
> -I didn't include Keisha's brother because it seemed unnecessary (oops)  
> -I really liked the deterioration of Newt's mind in the books better than the movie, so I added some direct quotes that he said to Thomas as he lost his mind.  
> -In the book, Newt went to the Crank Palace, whereas in the movie, he was off rescuing Minho. I stuck to the book version.
> 
>   
> 
> 
> None of the characters belong to me, but to James Dashner. Any direct quotes are credited in the work.

* * *

The moon shone bright against the rippling sea, the salty waves of the ocean mixing with Thomas’ tears as they breached his toes. His chest ached with the unrelenting sorrow and guilt that carried him through each day like puppeteer strings. Thomas considered venturing back to camp and finding the strongest bottle of whatever Gally cooked up, but even the thought of moving seemed impossible. Instead, he dug his hands into the sand, clumping it together and letting it slip through his fingers. It was a meaningless task, but one that distracted him nonetheless.

“Gonna have to sleep eventually, shank.”

Thomas didn’t turn around to the voice. He didn’t jump or reach for his knife; it had become a routine over the last month in the Safe Haven. “Thought you said you weren’t coming out here anymore.”

Minho groaned as he squatted beside Thomas. “I always say that. Never mean it.”

“What was it this time?” Thomas inquired.

“Dancing Grievers at my bedside.”

Thomas glanced out of the corner of his eye at Minho, who’s eyes were crinkled and mouth twitching with a smile. “At least it wasn’t Gally charging you naked and covered in blood again.”

Minho laughed. “That’s the worst one yet. I’d rather shucking throw myself back at WCKD than see that again.”

Thomas paused and picked up another handful of sand. “You think he found peace? Whatever that means.”

Minho clasped Thomas’ shoulder. “If there’s a heaven or paradise, or whatever, Newt’s there. Bet all the others, Chuck, Alby, and the other shanks are with him laughing up a storm at the mess we made here.”

A wave crashed higher up his legs, but Thomas remained in his spot, unwilling to move. Let the waves carry him away, or at least the burden of the decisions he faced. “I want to go back to the city.”

A large thump told Thomas Minho had laid back in the sand. “Of course you do. You’re a stupid shank.” Minho sighed and smacked the back of Thomas’ head. “I knew the second Vince suggested it that you’d decide to go.”

“It’s the right thing to do.”

“Doesn’t mean I’m excited about it, Thomas.” Thomas could hear the strain in Minho’s voice. He wasn’t keen on going to the city either, but they didn’t seem to have another choice.

“You can—”

“Shuck it, Thomas. I’m not staying here. I’ll come with you and the other shanks. We’ll get supplies, check out WCKD’s facility, and then I’ll live my happy life here eating bread and getting fat.”

Thomas and Minho fell in a comfortable silence after that, giving Thomas a small amount of peace at their nightly routine. Each night was the same, always clouded with nightmares, screaming, and Minho by his side at the waves. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some fun in the Last City :)

“Newt would be turning over in his grave if he saw this.”

Thomas scowled at Gally, who was stepping over piles of bones and ash in Denver. 

“Quit scowling, shuck face.” Gally kicked a skull out of their path. “I was kidding. Sort of. Lawrence really did a number here, didn’t he?”

The city was in shambles. What was left of the buildings was either gathered in piles on the ground or toppled over on top of each other. It looked even worse than the scorch, and Thomas already regretted his decision to leave Safe Haven. 

“Almost there!” Minho shouted from up ahead. 

The growing pit of nausea in his stomach rose to his throat. The last time he was in the city, he nearly died because of WCKD, and countless others died thanks to them. It would never stop, Thomas knew, the bitterness he felt every time he heard Newt’s name, or Chuck’s. They deserved to be here, to live and grow old in Safe Haven with everyone else. 

“Hurry up, you shanks!” 

Minho’s voice carried around the corner, and without thinking, Thomas took off running. _Something’s wrong, or someone’s died, or—_ Thomas ran smack into Minho, and gripped his shoulders to steady them. “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

“What’s wrong is you two shanks walk slower than Newt did on a bad day,” Minho said, smacking Thomas’ arm.

 _Damn it._ Thomas shook his head. _I did it again_. Someone would shout, or their voice would give out and Thomas would freak out, thinking the worst had happened. Despite nothing being wrong each time, Thomas couldn’t stop himself from panicking. It felt like he was waiting for the other shoe to drop, for him to realize it was all a trick by WCKD.

“Sorry, Minho,” Gally said, clapping Minho’s shoulder. 

They carried on, following Vince and four older Safe Haven immunes. The square in front of where WCKD’s headquarters used to be was nearly unrecognizable. The once lavish city was no more, destroyed without the slightest whisper of what it used to be. In a way, Thomas was grateful. Coming back was hard enough, and walking through the city where he dragged Newt’s half crank body had been haunting him the last half hour. _Maybe I’ll never recover from all this_. 

Thomas walked closer to the destroyed building, glass crunching under his feet. 

“You all right, kid?” Vince asked. 

Thomas could only guess what his face looked like right now—probably just as ashen and destroyed as the city itself. “Fine. Where to now?”

Vince raised a brow. “You’re the one with the special blood. Do we risk it and check for supplies inside, or do we keep moving and look elsewhere?”

Thomas glanced sideways at the building. Hardly any of it was left, and what remained was a maze of broken rubble and metal. “Not worth it.” Thomas paused. “I think we should check out the old Crank Palace.”

“Ah hell, kid.” Vince rubbed his blonde beard. “You sure?”

“You’re the one who asked,” Minho retorted. “Let’s go.”

Both Gally and Minho took off in the direction towards the berg, and Thomas jogged to catch up, leaving Vince and the others behind.

“I assume you have a reason for wanting to visit that place... Right, shank?”

Rather than telling Minho it had been an impulsive thought, Thomas said: “I thought it would be smart to check it out.”

Gally laughed. “In Thomas’s world that means he pulled the thought out of his ass. Lucky for us, his instincts are usually good.”

“Usually,” Minho grumbled.

A short flight later they landed outside the Crank Palace, and Thomas’ ears began to ring. _“And you, Tommy. You’ve got a lot of nerve coming here and asking me to leave with you. A lot of bloody nerve. The sight of you makes me sick.”_ Thomas shook his head. It would do him no good to fixate on things he couldn’t change. Besides, it wasn’t Newt who said those things. It was the flare.

The Crank Palace was in significantly better shape than the rest of Denver: A few of the house doors were open through the compound, buildings were empty, random blankets and pillows were scattered on the ground. None of the explosions from Lawrence had reached the compound, and any damage they saw, Thomas guessed, had been done by cranks. 

So far on their trip, they hadn’t seen a single crank. Therefore in Thomas’s mind, they were all hiding and waiting to attack, even though he knew they didn’t have enough stable brain cells to do so. And if there _were_ cranks, they’d likely be far from here. _Too many escaped the day the last city fell, anyway,_ Thomas assured himself.

Vince and his pals gathered supplies from the empty stations the immunes had occupied previously: several syringes, a few doses of the bliss drug, bandages and antiseptic. A few of the houses had food and cooking utensils that Vince repeatedly said would be washed thoroughly back in the Safe Haven. It wasn’t until they reached the end of one of the streets that Thomas saw a flicker of movement from his left. 

Thomas raised the gun, and waved a silent hand to the others. Not waiting for them to catch up, Thomas took the lead. When he rounded the corner, there was a woman holding a gun in his direction. 

Her dark eyes pierced Thomas’ own, unrelenting, but sane. “What do you want?”

“Who are you?” He asked, not lowering the gun.

The woman blinked. “You dumb, boy? I’ve got a gun pointed right at ya and you want to know my name?”

In other circumstances, Thomas might have laughed. “We’re here looking for supplies.”

The woman gripped the gun tighter, and Thomas was suddenly staring at another barrel of a loaded gun on a far different day. Something in his eyes must have revealed what he wouldn’t say, because the woman faltered. “You look like a dog stuck out in the middle of a storm. Who’s we?”

Thomas didn’t dare glance back to see if his friends were hidden behind the corner. “A few survivors. We came back for supplies.”

She lowered the gun slowly. “Why’d you come here? A few supplies ain’t worth it.”

Thomas kept his gun raised. He couldn’t tell her about the cure, or about his blood, even if she was the only person that seemed to be alive in the city. “Didn’t have a choice.”

“There’s always a choice, you dumb ass.” The woman shook her head, and gestured with her hand past the corner. “Tell your old pals to quit lurking in the shadows like a bunch of rats.”

This time, Thomas did look back to the others. They were wide eyed with their weapons raised. Thomas nodded once, and they rounded the corner.

Vince lowered his gun. “You immune?”

“Nah,” she said. “Was cranked out before the last city fell. Right as rain now.”

Thomas stumbled back a step. “How’s that possible?”

“You tell me. One morning after the city fell, I woke up and the fog was gone from my head, clear as the sky today.”

Vince tilted his head towards Thomas. He could see the question playing in his eyes. _Is she insane?_ Thomas shrugged. She certainly didn’t seem like a crank, especially like the cranked out version of Newt they saw months ago in this very compound.

“Ah, quit the silent yappin,” the woman said. “Got no reason to lie. You’d know it if I was bat shit crazy, believe me. I been there and it wasn’t pretty.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Thomas could see the others trying to get his attention. But Thomas kept his eyes on the woman, finally lowering his gun. “Anyone else with you?”

The woman hesitated, the pause far too long for Thomas’s liking. “Yes.”

“They immune?” Gally asked.

Again, the woman hesitated. 

Already dealing with his frazzled nerves being back in the city, Thomas snapped. “Look lady, we survived this hell hole once. Not too keen on staying here all shucking night waiting for you to answer. Who’s with you?”

To his shock, the woman smirked. “Sure you’re not losing your own mind?” When Thomas didn’t react, she shrugged. “Here with my kids. One of em was cranked out like me, but he’s good as new. Dunno if the other two are immune, but they’ve been all right so far.”

Thomas turned to Vince, who gave a resigned sigh. “Vince—”

Vince held up a hand. “I already know what you’re going to say, Thomas. Unless we can guarantee she’s free of the flare, can’t risk bringing her back.”

The woman appeared to be studying Thomas and the others far more intently than before. She ran a hand over her umber, dark brown cheeks, looking at each of them like a puzzle to be solved. Whatever she was deciding, Thomas didn’t want to know.

“We can seclude them. Keep them safe until we...” Thomas trailed off. “We can make a place for them.”

“You gonna ask my opinion?” The woman spoke up, her eyebrows creased.

“Uh,” Thomas mumbled. 

“What’s your say then?” Minho asked, looking around the compound. “You rather slum it up here with the cranks?”

The woman laughed and pointed a finger at Minho. “Funny. Gotta talk to my kids first, then I can let you know.”

“We don’t have time for that,” Gally replied. 

“Then make time. Go raid the houses for supplies, do what you came to do.” The woman turned to Thomas. “You willing to wait the course, Thomas?”

He blinked. “An hour.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quote one: Death Cure, Chapter 38
> 
> There are probably typo's, but this was just a quick write I did over Christmas--and I'm currently doing final edits on my novel to hopefully get published, so all my focus for edits is there :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short little chapter!
> 
> If you haven't read Crank Palace, Keisha is a wonderful character (arguably the only thing I liked about the book) that James added.

* * *

Almost an hour later, Thomas and the others were standing at the entrance to the compound, waiting for the woman to return. 

“If she’s not here soon, we’re leaving.” Vince held Thomas’s eyes. “You hear me?”

“Loud and clear,” Thomas said, hoping the anger and sarcasm in his voice was received.

“You sure about this, Thomas?” Minho had a hand on Thomas’s shoulder, and a concerned look on his face. “She might not show.”

“We said we’d wait an hour, so we’re waiting.”

“And what if she _is_ a crank?” Gally asked for the hundredth time. “What then, Thomas? Will your optimism and drive to save everyone save her?”

Minho groaned. “Dude, do you ever stop shucking whining?”

“I’m just saying—”

“Shuck it, Gally. Lady’s still got ten minutes. If she doesn’t show by then, we’ll leave.”

A few minutes went by, and Thomas was getting the same eerie feeling he had before the maze closed in on Alby and Minho.

“Something’s wrong.”

“Don’t start, you shuck face.” Minho grabbed his arm. “She changed her mind. Nothing we can do now.”

“No.” Thomas shook his head. “Something’s wrong.”

“Kid, we’re not relying on that gut of yours now,” Vince said. “Cranks could come at any point, and I’m not riskin my neck for some woman we don’t even know.”

Thomas glanced back at the street. Maybe it was his nerves, the same ones that told him something was wrong when it wasn’t. The woman probably changed her mind, or decided she didn’t trust them enough to come. Thomas was about to turn and tell them they could go when he hears a rustle down the street.

“Hold your horses!” The woman shouted, not yet visible. “Carrying a sleeping kid takes a lot of work.”

Thomas hurried forward to help her. When she rounded the corner carrying a small girl in her arms, Thomas offered his arms to her. 

The woman looked up with amusement twinkling in her dark eyes. “You offering? Fine by me. She’s a great deal heavier than she looks, the old lump.”

Thomas took the girl, who looked no more than ten or eleven. _Too young to be around this mess_. 

The woman’s chest was heaving and she pointed a hand back to the street. “My boys are on the way. Grabbed some more supplies for ya.”

Thomas carried the girl over to Vince and his pals, and passed her off. “Get her on the berg. We’ll get the other two and meet you there.” Vince kept a disapproving look on his face as he squandered over to the berg. _At least the shank didn’t fight me on it_ , Thomas thought.

“Names Keisha by the way,” the woman said, extending her hand.

“Thomas. That’s Minho, and the shank with the scowl is Gally.”

“I thought I heard something,” was all Gally replied. “Something not human.”

Instantly, Thomas reached for his gun. Starting from the tip of his head, running down his back like water, dread flooded his thoughts. _It’s nothing Thomas_ , he thought. _Quit being a shuck face baby_. What unsettled him more than Gally’s comment was the look on Keisha’s face. She had her hand on her gun, ready to defend. A mama bear in the wild.

A shriek echoed in the air, and Thomas froze. 

“Damn it, Thomas!” Gally raised his gun in the direction of the scream. It seemed far off, and was opposite of the direction Keisha came from. A few seconds later, there was another scream, followed by the sound of a distant gunshot. 

Minho lowered his gun and put a hand on Thomas. “Relax, you stupid shank.”

Keisha rocked back on her heels, and Thomas could see her shaking hands on the gun. _Her boys are still out there._

“Well, this is fun.” Gally lowered his gun. “Can’t say I missed that sound.”

“We’re coming, Keisha!” 

Thomas nearly dropped the gun in his hands at the voice. _There’s no way,_ he told himself. _My mind’s playing tricks on me again._ For a second, Thomas might have believed it to be nothing, but Minho’s hand on his shoulder tightened when the voice called out again. 

“Buggin’ crank.”

Keisha looked back at Thomas, a look on her face that he couldn’t decipher, and ran towards the voice. Her voice carried from around the corner, “Nearly scared me to death, you dumb ass!” Thomas heard her groan. “You heavy chump. Let’s go.”

Silently, Thomas watched as Keisha and her son rounded the corner. Thomas and the others hadn’t uttered a word since hearing the voice, likely too shocked and confused like Thomas was, to express any question in their heads.

A few steps behind Keisha, a tall shank rounded the corner. A large bag was slumped over his shoulder, and from the looks of it, another one strapped across his back. His skin was so pale it was translucent, his clothes loose on his thin frame. The boy ran a hand through his floppy blonde hair, but froze the moment he looked up.

The boy's eyes met Thomas’s, and he uttered the only word that came to his mind. “ _Newt_.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reunions! Finally.
> 
> You'll find out how Newt survived, because honestly, it's stupid that he didn't in the books.

* * *

The hand on Thomas’s shoulder fell, and Thomas heard the sound of a choked sob beside him. Newt’s eyes were still on Thomas, filled with the same emotion he had seen on Keisha’s face moments ago. 

“Keisha told me it might be you,” Newt said finally, his voice breaking. “Didn’t actually think—well, you shanks know how it is.”

 _“Thank you for being my friend.”_ All Thomas could do was stare. He didn’t know what he saw in Newt’s eyes as he looked back at Thomas. Thomas couldn’t decide if it was anger, or relief, or even both in his eyes. But the look vanished as a figure blurred past Thomas. And a moment later, Minho tackled Newt, clinging to him like he was the only remaining life line.

Thomas moved to step forward, but another voice in his head brought him to a halt. _“After all I did for you, after all the freaking klunk I went through in the bloody Maze, you can’t do the one and only thing I’ve ever asked you to do! I can’t even look at your ugly shuck face!”_

Thomas’s body trembled like he consumed too much caffeine as Gally took Minho’s place. Thomas would be lying if he claimed not to have dreamt about this moment, where in another universe, Brenda had arrived on time and Thomas hadn’t stabbed his best friend. Every time, Thomas ran forward without hesitation, a wide smile on his face and tears in his eyes. Now that the moment was real, Thomas felt painfully numb. “We...” Thomas swallowed. “We have to go.”

No one seemed to hear him but Keisha, who was still holding her son. The boy looked at Thomas with a small smile and then turned away. 

“Get your ass over there!” Keisha whispered. “Don’t care what happened that night. You two can hash it out later. I’ll take Dante to the rest of your group.” Keisha gestured with her head to Newt. “Now, _go_.”

As if in a dream, Thomas slowly stepped closer to his friends. Minho, who heard him coming, smiled with so much joy it stabbed at Thomas’s heart. _I killed Newt_. Up close, Thomas could see purple rims around Newt’s eyes, the new freckles scattered across his cheeks and the constant frown lines between his brows. Most importantly, the lack of black veins on his arms and face.

Newt gave him a tight smile. “You look like you’re going to have a buggin’ heart attack, Tommy.”

Before Thomas could second guess himself, he wrapped his arms around Newt. It took a few seconds for Newt’s arms to reach up and around Thomas’s back. The hesitation in Newt’s movement was obvious, even without looking at him. It made sense, considering the last time they had been this close, Thomas had stabbed him.

Thomas quickly pulled away. He turned his back on Newt and started walking. “We need to go. Vince will be mad enough as it is that we’ve taken so long.”

“Good that,” Newt replied, his voice thin. 

“Who cares?” Minho exclaimed. When Thomas looked back, he was wrapping an arm around Newt’s shoulder. “We’ve got this ugly shank back!”

What kind of shank wouldn’t be excited to see their best friend? _The kind who killed them in the first place_ , Thomas thought begrudgingly.

Newt caught his eye, and the same look from before was back. “ _It was all your fault! You could’ve stopped them when the first Creators died. You could’ve figured out a way. But no! You had to keep it going, try to save the world, be the hero. And you came to the Maze and never stopped. All you care about is yourself!_ ” Even now as they approached the berg, Thomas didn’t know what part of Newt meant the words he said whilst a crank. It didn’t matter now, he supposed, despite the words still echoing through his head.

Vince was waiting for them at the edge of the berg, and leapt to his feet when they approached. “Newt?” 

Newt laughed. “Vince. Been a bloody while, hasn’t it?”

“Thought you died.” Vince uncrossed his arm and hopped down, grabbing one of the bags Newt carried.

“Thought I did too. Imagine my surprise when I woke up and was still kickin.”

Vince shook his head, giving Thomas a disbelieving smile. “Catch us up on the way.”

Inside the berg, Thomas sat across from Newt and Minho, keeping his eyes on the ground as Newt spoke. “I’ll keep it short and sweet.” Newt grinned, slapping Minho’s arm. “Woke up a few days after the world went to hell. Keisha found me the morning after the attack, and drove around until she found a group of survivors. In their midst was a doctor from WCKD.” Everyone groaned. “You’re whining now, but the buggin’ devil saved my life. Gave me and Keisha the temporary cure and stitched up the wound in my chest.”

Thomas pressed his hand over his mouth and closed his eyes. He could have saved him. Avoided the entire thing. If only he had tried a bit harder. The entire thing was Thomas’s fault, just as Newt said.

“We stayed there for weeks while I healed. When we left, the Doctor gave us both an extra dose to keep us going until we found you shanks.”

“We had just returned to that gross place a few days before you arrived,” Keisha explained. “Kid was in rough shape.”

All Thomas could feel was guilt. All he could see was the blood pouring from Newt’s mouth and wound, the last words he uttered. _Please, Tommy. Please._

“What happened to you lot that night the city fell?” Newt asked. 

Minho looked up at Thomas. Thomas had no desire to recap the story of what happened that night, to relive the bitterness he still felt at Teresa. She had known, he realized later, that Newt wasn’t immune. Ava had told him as much before Janson shot her. _She never forgot, Thomas_. He could read between the lines. The entire time, she had her memories. The entire shucking time.

“After you died—collapsed,” Minho corrected. “Thomas ran in after Teresa.”

Newt‘s face tightened, his mouth pressed in a firm line. “No, you bloody didn’t, Tommy. Tell me you aren’t that stupid.”

Thomas couldn’t stand it. “I did what I had to do—”

“Shuck it, Thomas.” Minho bumped Newt’s shoulder. “I told you he was the shuckiest shuck face I’ve ever met. While you two were fighting, Teresa broadcast a message saying Thomas’s blood was the cure. Speaking of which, we’ll have to get that to you and Keisha once we arrive.” 

“Good that,” Newt replied, his angry eyes glaring at Thomas.

Thomas looked to the ground, unable to bear his anger. Rarely did Newt ever get angry (at least, when he wasn’t a crank,) but every time he did, it sent knives through Thomas’s chest. 

“Anyway,” Minho said. “After running inside like the stupid shank he is, Janson shot Ava in the head, then took Thomas. Teresa grabbed the cure, Janson shot Thomas—“

“He did _what_?” There was venom in Newt’s voice. Enough to nearly make Thomas look up. “Thomas, what the bloody hell happened?”

“—Then Teresa carried Thomas to the roof like a shuck moron and nearly got them killed. She handed us the permanent cure, then fell to her death as the building collapsed.”

The berg grew quiet. Thomas could feel Newt’s eyes on him. He didn’t look up. He couldn’t. 

“Well, I can’t say I bloody liked the shank, but I’m sorry, Tommy.”

There was nothing for Thomas to say. He couldn’t fess up to the small part of himself that thought she got what she deserved after what she did to Minho. What she _helped_ WCKD do to all of them.

“Been at Safe Haven ever since,” Minho continued. “Took Thomas a week to get his ugly butt out of bed.”

“He did get buggin’ shot, Minho!”

“Eh,” Minho said, winking at Thomas. “Thomas is fine.”

Thomas knew Minho was downplaying the truth of what happened by a lot. After he woke up, Brenda told him they hadn’t been sure if Thomas would pull through. For days after he woke up, Minho had refused to leave Thomas’s side, like he was afraid Thomas would meet the same fate as Newt. 

“Thomas almost died, you shank,” Gally said, turning to Newt. “Should’ve seen it. Everyone was losing their minds trying to save the stupid shank.”

Newt’s already pale face went as white as snow. His eyes searched Thomas’s body, likely looking for any sign of where the bullet wound occurred.

“Shuck it, Gally!” Minho yelled, glancing sideways at the horrified expression on Newt’s face.

The lingering tension in the air ate away at Thomas, and he clenched his fists. “How much further, Vince?”

“Ten minutes.”

 _Damn it._ Thomas leaned his head back in the seat, looking at Keisha and her kids huddled together in the corner asleep.

“Met them at the crank palace,” Newt explained. “Saved my buggin’ life.”

“You saved ours,” Keisha mumbled.

“When we land,” Vince shouted to them. “I’ll go ahead and seal off a hut farthest from the camp. Thomas, ready yourself to give up a pint of your magically healing blood. Let’s get these kids cured.”

Keisha cracked open an eye in Thomas’s direction. “You look squeamish enough as is. Sure you’re up to it?”

Even after hearing how she saved Newt’s life, Thomas was insulted at the insinuation. Despite the weird tension between him and Newt, there was nothing he wouldn’t do to ensure there would _never_ be a repeat of the last city.

“I’m fine.”

“Sure about that, Tommy? Keisha’s right, you look one wrong step away from passing out.”

“I’m _fine_ ,” Thomas repeated, his voice tight. 

There was an awkward pause. “All right, Tommy. No need to get your buggin’ knickers in a twist.”

Normally, Thomas would look up and see a smile on Newt’s face, no matter the circumstance. It brought him comfort, in a way. It had since his very first day in the glade. All that was on Newt’s face now... looked painfully similar to heartbreak.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quote 1: (Death Cure, Ch. 55)
> 
> Quote 2: (Death Cure, Ch. 55)
> 
> PS: Can you tell I don't like Teresa? Oops. I know she was trying to do the "adult thing" but still. She could have gone about it so differently.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter!
> 
> I left the ending vague, but read between the lines a bit :) 
> 
> Go Newtmas!

* * *

Thomas hadn’t slept a wink in days. It wouldn’t have done him any good, anyway. He would’ve slept an hour or two only to be woken up by another distorted nightmare. Most of the time they had nothing to do with reality, but the feeling was the same. The terror, the look in Newt’s eyes as he pleaded for Thomas to kill him. The past four days had been a whirlwind of reunions, parties, and awkward conversations. Thomas knew everyone, especially Minho, didn’t know what was going on inside his head. Every time they tried to talk to him, he changed the topic. Newt avoided looking at him most of the time, but they at least talked. Laughed, occasionally. Vince’s plan to take Thomas’ blood and get the cure to the others had gone swimmingly. Now safe to interact with the rest of the survivors, Newt was bunking with Thomas, Gally and Minho. Keisha and her kids had an entire hut to themselves.

When Thomas woke up panicking that night, he didn’t stop to put on a shirt before heading to the door. As Thomas neared the edge of the hut, he heard a rustle, followed by a hushed voice. 

“Don’t,” Minho whispered. “He does this every night.”

Thomas kept walking. He didn’t stop at the shore, just walked knee deep in the water. It was probably cold, but Thomas didn’t notice. His entire body was as numb as his mind after his nightmare.

“ _Didn’t you read my note? You can’t do one last, lousy thing for me? Gotta be the hero, like always? I hate you! I always hated you!”_

The words were as real as the sea water hitting his knees, and Thomas couldn’t get them out of his head. They kept coming back like the shore against the sand, seeping up any relief or hope he had with Newt.

“What’re you bloody doing, Tommy?”

Thomas' breath hitched in his chest. Panic rose steadily, but there was nowhere for him to run. Him and Newt still hadn’t talked about what happened in the Crank Palace. About the night in the last city when Thomas nearly killed him. No matter how hard he tried, Thomas couldn’t let it go. How could he? It was the thing that had kept him up every night for a month.

“Tommy,” Newt yelled, getting his attention. “Quit actin like a bloody shank and get over here.”

 _I can’t_ , Thomas wanted to say, but his feet carried him out of the water on their own accord—following the sound of the pied piper. Thomas plopped on the sand beside Newt, who was rubbing his leg. He refrained from asking about it, or suggesting he go to the med shack tomorrow. Truthfully, Thomas was refraining from saying anything at all.

“You know, when I was losing my buggin’ mind, I got memories back of my life before the maze.”

Thomas turned. “What?”

“About time, I suppose.” Newt laughed. Paused. “Go on, then. Ask away, Tommy. I can see that little curious glint in your eyes.”

Thomas considered. Then turned back to the sea. 

“Fine. Guess I’ll have to bloody start from the beginning.” Newt took a deep breath, and Thomas wondered how bad it would be. “We were all friends before the maze. You, me, Minho, Chuck, Gally, even Teresa. We snuck around headquarters every night, acting like we weren’t bloody traumatized kids forced to try save the world. You already know you and Teresa were their favorites. That much never changed. But before all that, I had a family.”

Thomas’s heart clenched at the pain in Newt’s voice. It was one of the reasons he never wanted to remember the past. He knew it would be far too painful to remember the things he couldn’t change.

“WCKD killed my parents, then took me and my sister even though I wasn’t immune. My _sister_ ,” Newt breathed. “Tommy, she survived.”

“Who?” Thomas asked, a broken whisper. He turned in time to see Newt smile. 

“Sonya.”

The same blonde hair, lean frame and brown eyes. How had Thomas never noticed? _Too busy focused on playing the hero._ “Have you told her?”

“Not yet.”

“You going to?”

Newt sighed. “Eventually. Got some other klunk to sort out with you first.”

Thomas swallowed hard, and stared out at the ocean. 

“ _Please_ , Tommy.” Thomas flinched. “You gotta bloody talk to me at some point. Can’t keep dancing around acting like it’ll buggin’ go away if you ignore it!” 

The sound of the shore wasn’t enough to calm Thomas tonight. He pushed to his feet. _You’re avoiding it, Thomas_ , he told himself. He heard a rustle from the ground, and was half turned back to the island when Newt spoke again.

“Please, Tommy.”

Thomas closed his eyes. “Newt, _stop_. Stop saying that.”

“Tommy—”

Frantic, Thomas tousled his hair and whirled around. “Do you even _remember_ what happened that night? In the last city?”

Newt’s face went pallid, nearly as pale as the moon. “Bits and pieces. But not everything.”

Thomas’s heart skipped a beat, anxious to hear the answer. But he had to know. Even if it broke him into a million pieces. “What do you remember?”

“Tommy,” Newt pleaded.

“Just say it!” Thomas shouted. “Go ahead, Newt. _Say it._ ”

Newt flinched back. “All right, you slinthead. I remember everything about the night you came to the Crank Palace. You showing up nearly did me in. Could barely see or hear.” Newt laughed and a tear fell down his face. “When I saw you in the city, it was worse. It’s when I stopped remembering as much. I know I almost killed you. So, I begged you to kill me.” Newt swatted the fresh tear from his face. “But you wouldn’t do it. I was losing myself, Tommy. I couldn’t take it anymore. I’m sorry.”

Thomas looked down at the ground and shook his head. “I killed you, Newt.”

“Well, you did a bloody bad job of it considering I’m standing _right_ here.”

Thomas didn’t have the energy to fight anymore. “What do you want from me, Newt? Do you want me to tell you about all the klunk going on in my head, or—”

“For starters, I want you to quit acting like a shank and tell me what’s the matter with you! You’ve been a shuck coward ever since I arrived. So what is it, Tommy? Regret not finishing the job?”

Thomas leaned his head up. Newt hadn’t bothered to wipe away the fresh tear on his cheek. 

“Regret?” Thomas’s voice gave out. “You—you think I regret not finishing the job? Do you even know what it’s been like here, Newt? Do you know the Nightmares I wake up from every night? Or the mornings I wake up to a splotchy eyed Minho or Frypan?” Thomas shook his head. “If you did, you would never say something that stupid.”

The expression on Newt’s face was absolute devastation, and it nearly did Thomas in. Thomas put his hands on his hips and gazed back out at the sea. 

“Did you mean what you said that night?”

“Gonna have to be more specific than that, Tommy.”

Thomas’ heart sank. “You can’t do one last, lousy thing for me? Gotta be the hero, like always? I hate you. I always hated you.” Thomas’s voice was flat as he repeated the words, but he could still hear them spitting from Newt’s mouth.

Newt’s expression twisted. “You think for a bloody second I meant that?” Newt laughed, but for once, Thomas didn’t enjoy the sound. “You’re a bigger slinthead than I thought.”

The two were silent for such a long time that Thomas considered walking back to the hut. _I can’t take this anymore_ , Thomas thought.

When Newt finally spoke again, his voice was a broken plea. “Thomas, the flare twists your thoughts! It takes your wants and desires and makes them the thing you hate the most in the world. Every good thing in your life is skewed by this little ball of darkness that you can’t buggin’ see through.” Newt’s eyes filled with tears, but he kept his eyes on Thomas. “There is _nothing_ , absolutely nothing I said at the crank palace, or in the last city, that I meant. You wanna know what I did mean?”

Slowly, Thomas nodded.

“In that note swinging around your neck—Yes, I noticed it. Saw it the day you found us in the last city.” Newt half-smiled, the first one he had given Thomas all day. “That’s how I—that’s the way I—” Newt cleared his throat. “I meant it. Every word.”

 _I’d follow you anywhere_. Thomas clutched at the note. It had been the only thing that held him together the last few weeks, the only thing that helped him believe that Newt hadn’t meant the things he said that night.

Newt gave Thomas a teary, crooked grin. “Be smart, Tommy. I could never hate you.”

Not wanting to waste another second, Thomas stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Newt. “I’m sorry,” Thomas cried into Newt’s shoulder. “God, I’m so sorry, Newt.” Thomas’s tears were soaking Newt’s shirt, but Thomas held onto him, gripping him with all his might. 

“Tommy,” Newt whispered, patting the back of Thomas’s head. “Look at me.”

Reluctantly, Thomas lifted his head from Newt’s shoulder. Thomas was shaking, likely from the lack of clothing and wading in the freezing water. But Newt’s brown eyes were warm as he gripped the back of Thomas’s neck.

“We’re going to be all right, Tommy,” Newt said, leaning his forehead against Thomas’s. “You and me, we’re going to be all right.”

Thomas breathed in the scent of the sea and Newt. _Salt water and the comforting smell of coming home_. Thomas’s heart settled for the first time in over a month.

They were going to be all right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quote: Death Cure, Ch. 55


End file.
